This goes out to all the women getting it in
Get on your grind
To the other men that respect what I do
Please accept my shine
Boy I know you love it
How we’re smart enough to make these millions
Strong enough to bear the children
Then get back to business
– Beyonce, Run the World (Girls)
Today is a rant … with a purpose. I am noticing some areas where we, as women in business, need to step up and suck it up to help each other and thrive. As I was writing this, the above Beyonce lyrics came to mind. We, as women, need to accept each others ‘shine’.
- I’m tired of seeing professional women hurt each other out of fear and competitiveness.
- I’m over all the territorialness.
- I’ve personally been hurt by women in PR who have chosen competitiveness over relationships.
- I’m tired of seeing hurt feelings fester instead of being constructively communicated and resolved.
I’m over it and I hope you are too.
The Problem isn’t Always the ‘Boys’
The truth is we are NOT in competition with each other. There’s more than enough business to go around and hurt feelings can only be coddled for so long. We have to suck it up, learn from experience and move on. I see too many women get their feelings hurt and harbor a grudge that in turn limits their network and keeps them from forming meaningful, lasting relationships with other women.
Mistakes happen. We won’t always say and do the right things. When mistakes happen and feelings get hurt, it can be awkward to push past and move forward. Be we must move forward. We must push through and press on or risk inhibiting our success and even more importantly, our relationships with other women.
I have been fortunate so far in business to have some really great female mentors. These experiences and relationships encourage me to be a better mentor and to seek out opportunities to mentor. I’ve also gotten to know women who, unfortunately, have more words than action. When the it comes down to it, they will only build other women up to a point because they let competition, territory and hurt feelings get in the way.
We Have a Choice.
I don’t claim to know it all. And although, I do tend to think I’m right the majority of the time, I do my best to see things from another perspective as much as possible. I know my way isn’t the only way or even the best way all of the time and I can’t promise that I won’t make the mistake of allowing feelings and competitiveness get in the way of building others up.
I do think it’s important to recognize this potential for relationship sabotage and I hope that when I have the opportunity to rise above or be catty, I choose the former.
I know these issues aren’t unique to women. I’m sure men struggle with these things too. I’ve just seen these behaviors demonstrated in professional women and I want us to collectively acknowledge our tendencies and move forward into deeper, lasting relationships. I want us to move past the hurt feelings and trust each other more.
We need to communicate and reconcile quickly.
We need to overlook little hurts and push past competition.
We need each other. Let’s start acting like it.